Last nigh I can not sleep (insomnia?!), so I got up and finished the book at 3am.
The author grew up in China during the Cultural Revolution. Each night she listened to her grandmother’s forbidden Buddhist prayers and she became interested in Xuanzang after she read the book Monkey King, given by her grandmother.
As the Revolution failed, the author began a search for her own beliefs and to discover more about the monk, Xuanzang by traveling from China along the Silk Road, through dangerous parts of Asia to India. This book gives us a vivid, fascinating insight into China and its history, and what Buddhism is in different area and different people’s mind.
I always want to know more about Cultural Revolution in China. My parents have told me what they have suffered and how crazy the people are in that time. But I feel not enough. I can read very little information in newspapers and books in China because Chinese government doesn’t want its people know the true of the Communist history.
I was free and I had not suffered like my forebears and my fellow-countrymen. But like so many Chinese, I felt strongly that something was missing. The idea of a confirming faith dies hard. I was increasingly unsure of where I was going, why I was doing the things I did; I was at a loss, and pondering. (P41)
I have the same lost feeling like the author. I may not have the chance to do the same things like her to find out more of the past of our country, but I can read books to know. Lucky I am, I have come to Australia and have found a lot of books about Chinese history. This book is one of the excellences.
Communists always say they united China and brought peace to the people. I doubt that. What about the Cultural Revolution? What about Chairman Mao’ deadly faults? Why Chinese people are prevented to discuss these kinds of matters? Yes, they did good things for our country but why they avoid admitting the faults?
Revolution in China almost pushed the people back into the abyss from which they had been saved, all in the name of Communist idea of absolute equality. The peasants, like the rest of the country, were so equal that nobody wanted to work: however hard they labored, they were paid the same. The whole nation lived on rations for more than thirty years. And then we suffered one of the worst famines in history, when over thirty million people died of starvation in the early 1960s, most of them in villages. (P282)
What caused this suffering, unprecedented in Chinese history? Never before was the whole nation, hundreds of millions of people, allowed to think only one thought, speak with one voice, read only one man’s works, be judged by one man’s criteria, Never before were our traditions so thoroughly shaken up, destroying families, setting husbands against wives, and children against parents. Never before was our society turned so completely upside down. The Party was barely in control, with all its senior members locked up or killed. Workers did not work; farmers did not produce; scientists and artists were in labor camps; not criminals, but judges, lawyers and policemen were in prison; and young men and women were sent to the countryside in droves for re-education. On top of the physical devastation, the psychological impact on everyone was even more poisonous. The Cultural Revolution brought out the worst in people. They spied on, reported, betrayed and murdered each other—the strangers, friends, comrades and families alike—and all in the name of revolution. So much hope, so much suffering and sacrifice, and for what? (P36)
Not only those who are the targets of the revolution suffered, but also those who joined the revolution got nothing but pain, regret, and confusion.
They were betrayed; they were even being blamed for what had gone wrong. The bitterness of loss was crushing and the void left in their hearts was deep. They found it impossible to cope with a past that had been cancelled and a future so uncertain. (P39)
Until now, the influences of the past have not yet disappeared. Some people who are sent to Xinjiang or some remote countryside to produce or re-educated have no chance to return home. Their children, for they can not find jobs outside the place they lived, also forced to stay.
They live in an impossible dream of returning home, and their longing has become a poison, filling them with loneliness, fear and resentment. (P141)
Many historical places or religious sites are destroyed by red-guards.
Temples in village were destroyed and the farmers used the stones to build pig-sties and houses. In Tibet, the destruction was almost total. Gone with them was a large part of our history, culture and life- a part we had denounced as antiquated, feudal and backward, a part whose value we did not know until it was gone. (P60)
In the way to unite all the nationalities in China, Communist government destroyed our religious and cultural roots. This do harm to our nation in the long run. I start to understand why Tibet and Xingjiang try to break up from mainland China. Minorities don’t admit to be ruled by Han and they do not feel the belongingness of China.
There is a song that‘56 nationalities are 56 flowers; 56 nationalities are the families of China’. It is easy to put them all in one song and one set of stamps; but to make them into one big, happy family will need more effort. (P348)
Though people suffered from the past, they try to lead a new life to their best effort. The author meets a man, Duan, who is used to be a monk before the Cultural Revolution but forced to married a woman in the revolution. He dose not return to be monk after the revolution and feels content of his poor and simple life.
Instead of blaming others and bearing grudges, Duan would always look deeply inside himself and think how he could improve. (P62)
The author finally reaches India. India is the neighbor of China and also a large population country, rapid developing. But actually they are quite different.
China and India seem to be humanity’s polar opposites. The Indians are philosophical, spiritual and transcendental, while the Chinese are practical, materialistic and down-to-earth. For the Chinese, the world we live in is all there is. Confucius told us that ‘to dedicate oneself seriously to the duties towards men, to honor spirits and gods but to stay away from them.’ For Hindus, religion dominates life. Their ultimate goal is moksha-the final liberation from this mundane and ephemeral world into blissful eternity. And they have a staggering 300 million gods and goddesses to help them achieve it. (P222)
The way Indian and Chinese people think of Buddhism is different too.
In China, people simply did what the sutras told them to do: to pray sincerely and make offerings to the best of her capacity, and leave the rest to the Buddhas and the Bodhissattvas.
Because Chinese people relay on the help of God and do nothing by themselves, government used to make people believe that Buddhism was nothing more than superstition. Even today, we regain religious freedom, the way we interpret Buddhism has not change much.
In India, Buddha was thought to be born a man and died as a man. ‘Pray to yourself, not to anyone else’. (P276) There is no other Buddha except what is inside you. Buddha himself did not approve of miracles: they were impediments to spiritual progress and the final awakening. (P295)
There is one interpretation of the Buddha’s teaching. I guess it tried to draw as many people as possible to Buddhism in the first place. Once they learn more about it, they would realize it is good for them and they would not need the extra incentives. (P274)
I try to learn Buddhism by myself and come to know that Buddhism is not only religious but also a philosophy that encourages people to find inner peace and achieve goals by ourselves.
Self-nature, complete and clear,
Like the moon in the water.
The mind in meditation, like the sky,
Ten thousand miles without a cloud. (P255)
And the most precious I learn from Buddhism is ‘Everything is impermanent’. We feel sad about the tragedy and show pity of the cultural loss. But this is the law of nature, everything is changing, no matter it is good or bad. We have to move on and content with what we have at the very moment.
There are conflicts between religion and science. Most people regard that the two are at daggers drawn, two can not exist at the same time. But I always think both religion and science are the themes of the world, people can not live without them.
I often think of Ganga as life, with science and faith as its two banks. The banks never meet but the river wouldn’t flow without them. Without science we would be back in the dark ages; but without faith life would be poorer. (P298)
We, Chinese have success at revolution and now focus on economic development. But there are still countries suffering wars and conflicts. Revolution is the common way people seek to liberate their country and sometimes it bring more suffering to people.
We have to free ourselves from the mental slavery we have grown up with. That’s our worst enemy. Revolution might be quick, but its results could not last; change had to come from people’s minds-that was the only durable solution. Had people’s mind been seized with hatred and revenge, I would have brought disaster upon this land. (P309)
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